• Follow us on Twitter, Instagram and Snapchat @FarHarNews

Farmers' Harvest

Column: Finding a reason to continue

‘Now I can officially say I love myself without any hesitation.’

%22The+next+day%2C+I+found+a+distraction+to+help+me+ignore+the+pain+I+felt.%22
Back to Article
Back to Article

Column: Finding a reason to continue

"The next day, I found a distraction to help me ignore the pain I felt."

Photo by Madison Ward

"The next day, I found a distraction to help me ignore the pain I felt."

Photo by Madison Ward

Photo by Madison Ward

"The next day, I found a distraction to help me ignore the pain I felt."

Hang on for a minute...we're trying to find some more stories you might like.


Email This Story






Darkness loomed around the room, leaving the moon as the only source of light shining through my window. My eyes stayed locked on the pill bottle on the nightstand. To me, it seemed like the perfect escape away from everything. Stress. Fights. My life.

Do it.

I grabbed the bottle off the stand, attempting to twist the lid off over and over again until I heard the lid pop.

Do it.

18.

The number of pills the bottle held inside. All of them poured out onto my hand like sugar.

Do it.

Tears streamed down my face as I realized I was still weak.

So weak I couldn’t take the pills.

I couldn’t bring myself to do it, no matter how exhausted I was from not being enough. I told myself to give it another chance.

To give life another chance.

The next day, I found a distraction to help me ignore the pain I felt.

People always say an artist “saved their life.” As cliche as it sounds, it became a reality for me. I struggled to motivate myself during junior year with the stress of not making perfect grades but then I found encouragement to keep going.

When I thought no one cared if I disappeared, I found seven guys who had a passion for music and a goal to express loving yourself before you can love someone else.

BTS, a Korean boy band who spread its message of loving and speaking for yourself. Music isn’t based on language, it’s based on the message given whether it’s in the tone or lyrics.

They gave me the strength to ignore thoughts inside my head which wanted to harm me. I started to love my flaws that were rejected by society.

I was able to see I never walked alone on this dark path I believed I was stuck on. Within the fandom, I found others who shared the same story as me.

Having a tendency of keeping things bottled up until I overflow with emotion, BTS helped me open up to struggles with my family and friends.

By their message, I was able to confide to my mother about my stress. Even when I’m exhausted, I can always be energized by listening to their music.

I believe I found BTS when I needed them. When I needed to hear their message so I would stop being so negative toward myself.

Now I can officially say I love myself without any hesitation.

I wouldn’t be smiling as much as I do today without them. They gave me the strength and wings to fly to do what I want.

To pursue what I want.

Print Friendly, PDF & Email
1 Comment

One Response to “Column: Finding a reason to continue”

  1. meme on April 27th, 2019 3:21 PM

    The world would be a sadder place with everyone in it Including who the story is about I am so glad that They Love themselves and a found a message that speaks to Their heart Some people your age are not as lucky as you are finding that messageThank you for sharing

If you want a picture to show with your comment, go get a gravatar.




Navigate Left
  • Column: Finding a reason to continue

    Columns

    Senior Goodbye: Saying goodbye or until then

  • Column: Finding a reason to continue

    Columns

    Column: Loving the unexpected

  • Column: Finding a reason to continue

    Columns

    Senior Goodbye: Moving to greener pastures

  • Column: Finding a reason to continue

    Columns

    Senior Goodbye: Can I try again?

  • Column: Finding a reason to continue

    Columns

    Senior Goodbye: Finding a group to belong in

  • Column: Finding a reason to continue

    Columns

    Senior Goodbye: The year I’ve been waiting for

  • Column: Finding a reason to continue

    Columns

    Senior Goodbye: Letting go of my past selves

  • Column: Finding a reason to continue

    Columns

    Senior Goodbye: Chasing the best dream

  • Column: Finding a reason to continue

    Columns

    Senior Goodbye: A new chapter begins

  • Column: Finding a reason to continue

    Columns

    Senior Goodbye: Moving on to the next chapter

Navigate Right
The school news site of Lewisville High School
Column: Finding a reason to continue